Top 10 things you don’t want to hear on a first date

 

a1 shock

1–   “I don’t want to brag, but as of 2 PM today, I have no restraining orders against me.”

2–   “If I weren’t so heavily medicated, that ice crunching you’re doing would be bugging the crap out of me.”

3–   “Before I can commit, I’ll have to get input from my cats.”

4-   "I’m married but we are seeing other people because she just doesn’t understand me."

5-   "I go to the Star Trek convention every year, you should come with me this year."

6.   "You look so much better in person then you do on the company’s hidden bathroom web-cam."

7-   "The doctor says it’s just a rash."

8-  "It looks like you weren’t able to cover up that zit with make up. Can I pop it for you?"

9-  "Just a warning, loving me means loving the Carpenters"

And the number one thing you don’t want to hear on a first date?

dum da dum dum da,…….

10- "My ex was so big I used to call him the human tri-pod"

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