So sick of being sick. :-(

It’s been a while since I last wrote.  I just haven’t been feeling well. My mind is much clearer and healthier than it was a few weeks ago but physically… not so much. For the past month since I started the new medication my doctor put me on, I have been feeling light-headed and ‘detached’. But the worst of it is I have had continued nausea which has been horrible. So all I’ve been able to do is sit on the couch and watch TV. I just don’t want to move due to the awful nausea. I just put it down to the new meds and that it would eventually disappear as I got more used to them. But yesterday I had another appointment with my doctor so I told her everything that was going on. She checked me over and then sent me for blood work. She thinks its my liver. I’ve had problems with it over the past year but I thought things had gotten better over the past few months. But she’s now thinking that this is the problem ~ not my new meds. I just don’t know anymore. All I know is I’m just sick of being sick all the time. I long for a normal life. Be like everyone else. ~ sigh ~

The second thing bothering me is my Seroquel medication. I had run out of it 3 weeks ago so have not been on it. Suddenly I ‘woke up’ The hangover feeling I always have disappeared. I was waking up early every morning and sleeping a LOT less. I didn’t have that tranquillized feeling anymore. It was a nice break. But yesterday the doctor made me go back on it. I was disappointed but she is the doctor and knows best (??) Anyway,… I took my 300mg at 4 in the afternoon. By 6:30pm I couldn’t keep my eyes open and went to bed. I didn’t wake up until 1:30 this afternoon! That means I slept for 19 hours!!  19 hours! That’s ridiculous! Proof that this drug knocks me out. I have been on this drug for about 4 or 5 years and I can’t help feeling like it has robbed me of these past years. All I do is sleep and when I am awake I am so ‘drugged’ I don’t function. So to be told I really do need to stay on it was really disappointing for me.

The good news is that my Trellis app’t came through and I will be seeing them next week. My hope is that once I get myself set up with a psychiatrist I can go into more depth with him about my seroquel problems and maybe we can come to some sort of compromise with another drug. The problem with this is I have no medical coverage of any kind so I can’t afford medication. My doctors get it for me by getting samples from the drug reps. And usually you can only get samples of the most current drug. So one of the reasons I’m on seroquel is that it is an easy drug for the doctors to get from the reps as it seems to be the “in” drug at the moment in the psychiatric field. It’s hard to get a different one. So unfortunately I am kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to medications. It really does go back to the “Which is worse? The disease or the side effects of the drugs to combat them?”

Again,…. all I know right now is I’m just sick of being sick.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Elizabeth Banresco
    Jul 21, 2011 @ 13:01:20

    Jacquie…have you applied to Trillium Foundation? They provide income-geared drug coverage to folk without plans…ask the pharmacist for an app, or go online and google Trilliium Foundation…huggzzz! (Elizabeth Barnesco)

    Reply

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