Looking at the positive

the ol gang

 

I know when I write in my blog it’s usually to vent about all my “issues” but today I wanted to right a positive entry. Just to show I do have “up” times. It’s not always the struggle it can be.

Last night I went to a get together. It was all the kids that we grew up with on our old street. I hadn’t seen some of them in years! With my social anxiety I can’t always go to these things. But last night once we were all together it was like we all just picked up where we left off. I really was lucky to have grown up on a street that had so many kids. And most of our families stayed there for many, many years so we all knew each other really well.

We sat around the fire and had a few drinks and just relaxed. The weather was perfect,… My friends home is beautiful with lots of land hidden away from anyone so it was like we were all at a cottage. I can’t tell you how good it felt to just chill out ~ NO anxiety ~ and just be myself.

I’ve been looking back and I do notice that over the past few years (pretty much since I moved here to Fergus) I have definitely been getting better. I would never have been able to go out like I did last night a few short years ago. I would have made an excuse and not gone at the last minute because I would have gotten so anxious. Now I’m not saying I’m ‘cured”. But life has some laughter in it now. I still struggle with day to day things and I always will. But overall, I am blessed that my life has really done a 180 and I feel so much better in myself.

I don’t trust this disease though (mental illness ~ depression, OCD and my social phobia) It just sneaks up on you and smacks you right on the head without any warning or reason. I will never be cured and I will definitely still have all my ups and downs. But the difference now is that I have help and understanding from my friends and family. They don’t judge,… they just love me for who I am. Quirky, wacky idiosyncratic Jacquie.

 

 

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. robbear13
    Sep 07, 2014 @ 21:36:33

    You still have the Black Dog of depression. But you have given it a good, solid, kick in the butt! Same thing for those other nasties. You are making PROGRESS!! Way to go, Jacquie!

    Blessings and Bear hugs!

    Reply

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