Take me away to a white sandy beach please

This week has been brutal. I have not just slipped,… I have tumbled off the path and rolled into an overwhelmed heap on the ground. I have got a few things going on that are really stressing me out and I’m not dealing with it all very well. Well, actually I’m not dealing at all. I have retreated into my black fog and hibernated there for the past few weeks. I’m trying to shake all this off and get back on the path again but I’m afraid it’s not going to be that easy this time. Too much going on that I have to figure out but can’t. I’m stuck.

And to top it all off,… I came across pictures of my nieces baby shower. This is a niece through my ex husband. I didn’t know that the shower was even happening but there it was. Popping up all over my Facebook page. It just made me really sad. I have nothing to do with my ex’s family anymore even though I still very much like them. And I have known this niece (We’ll call her A) since she was a baby. She stayed with us a lot as we loved to have her. And now she is married and having a baby. It was just really sad to see my own daughters at this shower, my ex’s family and of course all the friends that “used” to be mine until I ‘lost’ them in the divorce. I was just all too aware at losing all of this. I wished I could reach out to A and congratulate her but I know I cant do that. It would upset too many people. So instead I have to see my own girls having fun with A. I guess its just a simple case of feeling left out. That ‘world’ used to be mine. Now, no one talks to me and I am all too aware of this. So I keep my distance ~ but it still hurts. I just really didn’t need to see all of this today. I’m already depressed and that just added to it.

I have another pressing issue I have to deal with as well. (which I will get into another day,…) so I’m feeling very overwhelmed. Guess it’s back to the doctor for me again,…

Sorry this blog entry is such a downer, but that’s where I am right now,… down.



4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. robbear13
    Nov 17, 2014 @ 10:21:53

    I’m so sorry to hear all of this. Sounds like a huge burden!

    Blessings and Bear hugs as you try to cope. (Lots of blessings; gentle Bear hugs!)


  2. robbear13
    Nov 18, 2014 @ 14:39:09

    Done! Bear always likes to hear from his “groupies.” (That’s what Susan Flett Swiderski calls my “Followers.”)

    More blessings; more Bear hugs!


  3. robbear13
    Nov 23, 2014 @ 17:53:12

    Another way to approach this is for someone to dump a truck load of white sand in your place, and let you make the kind of beach you want. And re-make it when you want.

    Blessings and Bear hugs!


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