Stuck inside Mathilda

Today has been a very hard day. I have not been at my best for a few months now but I would have to say this week has been the worst. I am stuck. I can’t pull myself together to even function. I spend most days in bed or watching TV. I have so many things I am behind on but cannot motivate myself to do them. I am again isolating in my apartment. I just don’t want to see or talk to anyone. Going out is just out of the question right now. I can’t even do my laundry so it has piled up and just looks too overwhelming to start. In fact everything is overwhelming right now. There is no more Jacquie right now ~ I’m all Mathilda. The black fog that surrounds me and leaves me a prisoner in my own head.

But I am not giving up. I know this illness is a roller coaster so I’m hoping I’m just in a downward spiral that soon start moving up again. Until then, I wait it out.


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